Friday, October 10, 2014

Warm Blood

I know I don't post much lately, it's been months since I last updated this. There was a time when my blog was a huge part of my life, when something outstanding happened to me I couldn't wait to write it down and let the world know about it, but somewhere on the road it stopped being so important. I have learnt to appreciate moments that are forever gone without trying to posses them all in photographs or writings. Sometimes I don't feel like a photographer/writer anymore. I'm trying to live in THIS moment, and god, it's hard! I have always being attracted to that nostalgic feeling of the past but also to the hopes of the future, my head living in between those times, remembering and planning, but not much of enjoying the present.
I want to find the balance, to be happy with where I am right now, but I want to start documenting again. I hope there still is a creative person somewhere inside me.
I re-read my old posts and how I craved feeling, warmblooded experiences and passion. And oh, I have felt! The most beautiful love and maniac passion and a blinding hate and utter sadness, This year has been full of that. One day I found myself lying on the floor, tears running unstoppable down my cheeks and all I wanted was an end for this, and end for this love that was driving me crazy, an end for this hurting that was killing me. I loved him beyond words and all that I felt just couldn't fit in one body. It was hard to get out of the dark hole I was living in, but then I realized that it was exactly what I always asked for. I wanted to live, to feel and to love this intense and passionate, and that is exactly what I got. It wasn't sweet, pretty and lasting, it was fast, honest, and fierce. It was beautiful while it lasted, but now is the moment to continue with the life, And there are so many places, people and experiences ahead!
I will try to write and photograph more often, to post more and focus in those things that I love and that I've stopped doing. I know I'm going to be happy again and everything will be fine, like it always is, I just need time.









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